Wednesday, July 24, 2002

Dick's Last Resort. Hilarious restaurant. You go there, it's a mess. People throw stuff all the time--wadded up balls of napkin, paper placemat, whatever. the waiters are vaguely rude, tossing a pack of silverware on the table, throwing napkins in the air and hoping they land on your table...and if you have a cool waiter, he'll make you a hat. They write things on paper, staple it into a little hat, and put it on you. Your table laughs uproariously, then you find out what it is. In our group we had hats that said things like "Professional Dildo Tester", "I brush my teeth with dirty tampons", "my vibrator chips my teeth", "my friends think I'm straight", "Hooker in training $10 (crossed out) $5 (crossed out) $2" and "I finger bang my dog". My favorites from around the restaurant were "Ask about my group rates", "the priest took my cherry" (on a man...so wrong, yet so funny...), and "sperm bank, deposit in rear" (bad, in every way, and yet funny in that context). There is a live band that does covers, and takes requests from cute girls. The food is remarkably good--but it would have to be because the place is such a mess (paper products balled up all over the floor....everywhere.....). People actually took children there--we saw several who were probably 10. Lots of bachelorette parties. Several drunk people--one who passed out on the table actually. It's very loud. It's very lewd. It was SO FUNNY. All my friends wore their hats all the way home. Walked three blocks to Michigan Avenue, then took a crowded bus to Belmont, where we walked through boystown to Ken's place. They even wore them in Dominicks. wow. (I left mine at the restaurant..because I'm a wuss that way.)

It was crazy-fun.

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