Saturday, June 15, 2013

dear dad

my awesome dad in front of the Modern Wing of the Art Institute, when it had just opened
I write a lot of dear-mom letters. I miss my mom every day, and there are some things a girl just needs her mom for.

But I haven't written a dear dad letter, maybe ever. I don't know why--you would think I'd have learned my lesson about saying the important stuff before it's too late.

So, here goes.

Dear Dad,
Thanks for being awesome. You took on a lot when you came into our lives more than 20 years ago. You wrapped up me and my brother in your heart in ways we could never have expected. You've supported us through more bad times than seem fair, and innumerable good times too. You're generous and kind, and even though you don't talk much (which I confess I joke about sometimes!), I've never wondered if I matter, I've never wondered if I was good enough, and I've never wondered if you love me.

I appreciate how you always send a Valentine box and an Easter basket and just about whatever I've asked for in terms of birthday and Christmas presents (even when I say it's ridiculous as I ask). You've been beyond patient when I couldn't quite figure out how to get the gift-giving thing in order myself, and only joked a little about the year that you got a combined birthday-christmas-fathers-day gift because I couldn't decide what picture frames to get. You've been keeping me (and my brother) above water for years, holding us together when we couldn't quite do it ourselves. Actually, I should write that whole sentence in the present tense, because who are we kidding: I like to pretend I'm a real grown up, but we both know the reality isn't quite as neat or independent.

I'm sorry I'm difficult sometimes. If it was possible to apologize on behalf of my brother, who's equally difficult, I would, but since I can only speak for myself...well...please just know that we both know we're a pain in the you-know-what, and we're grateful for your patience and your encouragement and your challenge.

Thanks for teaching me how to do things, and going along with some of my wild ideas, and being willing to try out opera, and helping me through life, and sending me random movies and books.

Love you, dad. Happy Father's Day.

love,
me!

PS: I'm glad you're coming in summer this year....we should take some more pictures. lol.


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