Wednesday, September 24, 2008

more whelmed than I want...

I'm in that place of feeling overwhelmed--there is so much to do, so much going on, so many people to care about, and so little time to process.  In 3 days this week I've already worked 34 hours, and I still have two more days (long ones, too) to go.  There are many more people who need things ($$, gas cards, prayer, more prayer, classes, worship, meetings, more prayer, someone to talk to, etc etc etc) than I can handle on my own. I'm going on week 2 of headaches, though last week's was weird and very specific, and this week is cluster headaches around my right eye, so I doubt they are related.  I had a horrible dream this morning (all I'll say is this:  it wasn't a vegetarian friendly dream, it happened at church (weirdly), and my mom was in it.).  I miss my friends and am having one of those days when being single and living alone sucks.  I miss my mom today but can't figure out why today more than any other day.  I'm tired and I don't want to teach a class on predestination tonight, I don't want to argue about heaven and hell, I don't want to do anything except sit on my couch and cry and then pet my kitties.  My house has been taken over by fruit flies because I apparently had bananas that I forgot about in the fruit bowl (and which got covered up by a piece of foil so I couldn't see them) and I don't even have time to clean my house or deal with this problem.  

I, apparently, just want to whine and complain.  I haven't had a day where I've felt like this is a really long time.  Whine and complain, sure...I'm a pro...but crying and wanting a roommate and a housecleaner and more cats and a vacation, all at the same time?  unusual.

Obviously I need a nap, but instead I'm going to work now....sorry for inflicting my breakdown and my neuroses on you all.


  1. I can't help with the mom part, but I have been exactly where you are for the rest of it. Some days, it just sucks, but you will get through this day, I promise. You are in my prayers today and in the next few days.

    Is there a maid service you could treat yourself to for the weekend?



  2. Sorry you're having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. I guess you could move to Australia, but I'm not sure that would help much.
    But I will say that you need to let somebody in your church (the session?) know how overwhelmed you are. You can't keep this up. It's not physically or mentally healthy. You are a wonderful talented energetic person, but you are not superwoman and cannot do it all--especially two people's jobs smashed into one.
    Any chance of canceling the class? I'm just saying, you need a mental health break girl!
    As for the loneliness, call me anytime!!

  3. I ditto much of whatbecca said, including the call me anytime. And the cleaning service.

    Another thing - is the church paying you an adjustment for doing all you are doing from Aug. 3 or whenever Rick left to when the interim arrives? If not - they should be doing so - they you could MORE that get a cleaning service for one week - like every other week for a few weeks - and be fairly compensated.

    Cleri of session? Committee chairpeople? Call 'em. Don't work yourself sick. I'm praying for you, my dear friend.

  4. I'm not anonymous - it just jumped there - I'm Sarah!

  5. I hope today has gotten better for you.


  6. We need to have an Art Institute and ice cream day. If you keep working like this, you will make yourself sick (or more sick, rather--sounds like you're having stress/tension headaches). Let's go do something fun soon--it will be good for you! You deserve a break!

  7. It is hard being single and in the ministry. It would be nice to have someone at home to talk back to you other than the pets who stare, lick and meow/bark "Feed me! Pet me!" Oh it is such a "ME" oriented world.

    But I'm comforted to know that other single pastors deal with the same struggles I do. My thoughts and prayers are with you Teri.

  8. It comes with the territory, Teri. You're in a vocation, not a job, that means it's a way of life.

    I've been 23 years in this and a 65-75 hour week is not unusual. All the time, I need God to help me. I can't do it without Him...and do you know what? I shouldn't be able to do it without Him either.

    A Pastor's hours: all the overtime you don't want, and working every Sunday.

  9. Did you deal with the fruit flies yet? because I've got an easy solution (that will also force you to drink most of a beer...)

    Take a piece of paper and make a funnel with a tiny little hole at the bottom. It should fit snugly into a glass, leaving about two inches between the bottom of the cup and where the bottom of the funnel is.

    Fill the bottom of the glass with beer. But keep it low enough that the funnel bottom won't touch it.

    Tape the funnel snugly into the glass.

    Leave it there. The fruit flies will fly in and not be able to get out. Just leave it there for a while, a day or two.

    Drink the rest of the beer. breath.